Just as soon as I think I have this parenting shit nailed, the landscape changes and back to square one googling “Why won’t my child sleep during the day?”. Everyday is completely different and as much as we are into our routine, I just couldn’t tell you what each day is going to be like.
“Am I losing my mojo? Did I have it in the first place?”
I was on mum cloud nine last week when Eva let me “put her down” for a nap. I got a shower and washed my hair!!! This was such a big deal that I had to share this amazing news with my fellow instamums!
Silly me for thinking this was now a thing. This was not a thing. This was a one of, never to happen again, bloody miracle. >sheds a little tear<.
What has become a thing is Eva rolling from one side of the room to the other. Joy! I have this weird cocktail of emotions with this milestone of; pride, dread, sadness, happiness and annoyance that I now can’t take my eyes of her for the next ten years!
So am I losing my mojo? Did I have it in the first place? Just as I thought I was getting the hang of things, I’m becoming overwhelmed with all of the new shit I need to learn. And don’t get me started on the gut wrenching guilt because I actually uttered the words “I’m quite looking forward to going back to work”.
So as I sit here (with 4 day old hair), in the most uncomfortable position known to man, dying for a wee (but no way am I waking Eva up), a washing pile as high as Everest, sick on almost every pair of shoes I deem comfortable enough to wear (lol at stilettos) and the house resembling a bomb site, I just need that voice inside my head to say you got this.